The Greatest Story
by Hazy-chan
Summary: To write a great story the characters have to follow their designated role, this is the rewriting of such a story to make it into the greatest story ever
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: This story came to me as I was thinking of Lydia and if she was able different decisions for herself, after all if she can manipulate people to do what she wanted she couldn't truly be stupid and with a father who liked to read and improve his mind it doesn't seem like any of his daughters were idle, not even Lydia. Plus I like to hear stories of the girls being closer to each other.

I do not owe Pride and Prejudice.

Chapter 1

Lydia stared at the snowflakes falling all over her, her tears spent and the cold numbing her. It's been more than six years since that dreadful mistake as a young woman that spiraled out of control and killed more than half her family. At the thought she wanted to cry again but she was too numb too spent to do anything more than stare at the snowflakes that fell on her without restrained. She thought of her last ever conversation she had with her sister Lizzy

**Two months before finding herself in an empty field with snow covering her person:**

She finally made it to her parents house. Longbourne. How she wished she came for happy celebration but it was not meant to be. It was to the death of her oldest sister Jane. Lydia sigh and her tears almost fell again at the thought. They lost Kitty three years before to a trifling cold, how she wished she could have been there, her most beloved sister, her partner as children and young women, her confident. Then came her mother not even a year before, spent with the tryings of seeing her daughters, unhappy, in marriages and employments she tried so hard to not let happen. And now Jane, sweet Jane, who married a widower of three children who worked her to death and demanded children of their own. Sweet Jane who died as did her child in childbirth. It was all this that was caused by Lydia. Lydia who wanted to marry first, who lacked propriety, who thought all were as good and as willing to love her as her family. She learned very early on after her marriage to Wickham that those were fancies and her family sheltered her so much to not know the real evils of the world and the world of men. She shook herself dispelling the harshness of Wickham of his mistress of the men he kept company.

"Lydia. You have come." Her sister Elizabeth rushed out and hugged her tightly. It was then her tears came and cry she did, there was comfort to be found in her oldest sister's embrace. They broke apart and Lydia stared at her sister who became a governess not long after she married, her impertinence and the laughter in her eyes disappearing with every year. They were not supposed to be like this, they were supposed to marry … for love … for happiness.

"Come Lydia, let's go inside. I am glad you have come."

"What of Mary?"

"She's attending to the guests. We both have to leave to our duties in three days time."

Lydia nodded and let herself be dragged in the house, there were not many trips that happened in her marriage to Longbourne. Even if she was able to come, which she did not, she didn't think she would. Longbourne was happiness, was her youthful fancies and giggles with Kitty.

The day passed with the procession of Jane's funeral, eventually night fell and all the inhabitants want to bed. She found herself in the room she shared with Kitty, left unchanged by the years except for being dusted recently with her arrival. She opened the dresser and found an old bonnet. She could remember buying it with Kitty and fighting over yet. Her struggled to keep from screaming brought about a muffled cry. She started to sob. Not long she heard the door squeak and Lizzy came in immediately hugging her person.

"I'm so sorry, i'm so sorry. I was so foolish, I have doomed us all. I'm so sorry, please believe me, Lizzy. I am so sorry."

"Hush, Lydia whatever are you sorry for."

Lydia stifled another cry.

"For my foolish actions that made us arrived here Lizzy, for taking away your happiness, Jane's, for mother's death and … Kitty's."

"Lydia, dear, those were not your fault." Elizabeth said quietly and feverently.

"How can you say that, Lizzy? My decision to marry Wickham to run away with him doomed us."

"Lydia" Lizzy took her sister's face and held it "it was not your fault, we should have made more of an effort to show you the propriety, papa should have put his foot down more rather than find amusement in anything and everything especially when it came to his family. You were but ten and six, my dear, our mother pushed us to marry regardless of the person, though she did love us. It is not your fault. I love you, Lydia and I am not sorry for not keeping you away from the life you now endured with Wickham." Lizzy embraced her sister, she was skin and bones and hagarred, her joyful and rambunctious girl she knew was gone, replace by a women who looked older than her twenty years.

Lydia let her sister say what she wanted or needed to say, her heart was touched by the declaration that despite everything she was loved. They cried themselves to sleep and fell asleep in Lydia's old bed, neither wanted to be alone in the house so quiet, knowing that in the morning they would not hear their mother asking for her salts, that they would not see their father's amusement and their favorite sisters there to welcome them with their smiles and love.

**Back to the field of snowflakes **

"I wish I could go back, I wish I could make it write." She whispered to the snowflakes.

"Do you really?" A person was bending over her, unable to discern if it was a woman or man Lydia kept her eyes gazing at the snowflake.

"Do you truly wish to go back?" the figure asked making Lydia focus a little.

"I do." Lydia said most ardently

"I might be able to make that happen, seeing as your actions have ruined one of the greatest stories ever written."

Lydia wanted to rise but her body was too numb for such an action.

"Greatest story?"

"Of course, my dear. Your oldest sisters story would've ended a different way had you waited longer to run away with that scoundrel Wickham."

Lydia shuddered to think of her husband, scoundrel was the polite term for what her husband was.

"Would Jane have been happy in another story? Alive? What of Kitty?"

"Of course my dear, they would've been extremely happy all of them, except you my dear, your ending would've been the same, the wife of Wickham, though he would have treated you better seeing as his pockets would've been empty otherwise."

"I do not care about me, but I so dearly want to make right by my sisters. Please sir or madam, please let me go back and fix it. They should be happy, alive, all of them." Her tears started flowing again though she didn't think she had any more to spare.

"Alright, I will allow such, though your story might be altered as well, due to your knowledge of the events. Do better Lydia, after all even at a young age you have been smart to get your way."

Lydia closed her eyes, sure that the cold had claimed her, that the talk she had was figment of her imagination to relieve her guilt, to try to make it better for her sister. This was her death and she welcomed it as that would relieve her of her struggle of being the woman she became because of her young fancy.

"Lydia, Lydia, do you mean to stay in bed the whole day, sister. We promised mama we will go to town today. Lydia wake up."

Lydia smiled she could hear Kitty, her dear sister.

"Lydia come!" Kitty exclaimed frustrated now as her sister did not stir except for smiling, shaking her.

Lydia's eyes flew open startling Kitty.

"Kitty?" she asked unsure

"Yes, come on Lydia. I shall take your best bonnet if you do not hurry to dress."

Lydia stared at her sister unwavering making her sister huff and quitting the room.

Lydia stared after her and then about the room. She was back, she was back before her mistake, before Kitty … and mama … and Jane she couldn't say it out loud. Their maid came in and Lydia went through the motion of dressing without a comment which quite scared the maid into finishing early and quitting the room in haste. Lydia went down the stairs in a trance. She opened the drawing room only to hear her mother's words

"Oh, Lizzy how you try my nerves, girl. Please be mindful of your mother's weak constitution."

Lydia looked about the room and saw all her family gathered about, Jane smiling at Lizzy who rolled her eyes, Mary in a corned of the room reading, Kitty trimming the bonnet she claimed to wear to town.

Before she hit the floor she could hear her mother and sisters cry out her name in alarm.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note:** First I want to thank everyone who review, it was amazing hearing you guys like the premises. Second I am sorry I have no idea how to write in regency dialogue, I wanted her to be in regency era because it makes more sense to the story but the dialogue will be more modern with some things in there a little regency (just a tiny bit) that I can remember from reading other stories and pride prejudice itself. And third there was a reviewer who mentioned that all the girls are self-sacraficing, thing is that Jane and Lizzy would marry for love because they have some prospects, but in this story Lydia runs away and the family falls very low, and Jane can be as self-sacraficing as that because she believes the good in people and to give her mother some peace. Mary never thought she would really get married and Kitty dies. When Lydia is welcomed home for the funeral is only by Lizzy, and Lizzy can definitely blame herself because she could've made more of an effort to raise her sister better. They all have regrets and pain. I hope this explains where that came from.

Chapter 2

"Mr. Jones is she alright? It is not Lydia's fancy to swoon." she could hear her mother talking to, she remember as the ton's apothecary. Her mother? Mr. Jones? Her eyes flew open and she raised herself abruptly.

"Oh Lydia, please lie down. You just fainted not too long ago." Before she was pushed down again she could see her sisters hovering around. She burst into tears of happiness, of relief. Her sisters were all there, her mama was there.

"Dear what is wrong?" Her mother asked embracing her and rocking her gently shushing her cries with a tender tone, this made Lydia cry harder. Her sisters unable to discern the reason for her distress hovered about her bed. Eventually Lydia was spent and was let to sleep. Kitty agreed to stay with her and keep her company on the off chance that she would need anything or that she would feel worse once she wakes up.

Lydia's dreams were fretful and though she got a little bliss of having her sisters in her dream they were always taken away from her, by diseases, and most often by Wickham. The nightmare became too much and she woke up startling Kitty who was dozing off in a chair when she cried out. All the women of the household burst into the room, Jane being the first and immediately going to hug her and giving her comfort.

"Lydia, please, you are all right. We are here. There is nothing to fear, dear sister." Lydia hugged her fiercely. "Jane I missed you so much." she whispered.

"I will always be here, Lydia, always." Jane let herself be hugged though it was hard for her to breathe a little. The last to enter was Mrs. Bennet and she took over for Jane and hugged her dearest young child again and rocked her and asking her gently what was wrong. It was noted to say that Mrs. Bennet has never had to deal with sadness or pain from any of her girls, they were all so positive and cheerful and outgoing that she didn't think they could ever be sad, seeing her youngest the most lively of her girls behaving as such was wreaking her poor nerves and she wanted her salts more than ever but her attention to her daughter took precedent to what she might be feeling.

The next day all the women of the Longbourne manor woke up later in the day than was usual but everyone knew the house was in agony at Lydia Bennet's ordeal. She has not spoken yet for her behavior and they were eagerly waiting to hear what happened. Upstairs in their shared bedroom, Lydia woke up without a cry and sat up, she saw Kitty on a chair holding her hand in hers, she looked like she cried. Lydia felt like crying again but she couldn't wake Kitty up again. It didn't seem like Kitty slept very well and she knew that was all her fault.

"Kitty," she whispered "Kitty, let's get you to bed." Lydia gently said coaxing her sister towards her bed.

"Lydia?" Kitty sleepy asked

"Yes."

"Lydia?" Kitty said more clearly, her eyes opened and looking at her sister. "Are you alright? What happened? What's been wrong with you?"

Lydia stopped and looked at Kitty.

"I have had a bad dream, nothing to really worry about, just felt real." Lydia said looking down and biting her lip, imploring Kitty silently not to ask more questions.

"Lydia," Kitty took her hand and held it giving her a comforting squeeze "you know you can tell me anything."

Lydia looked at Kitty and she knew that if she told her she would be comforted, reassured and made to feel safe, but she knows she can't, it just felt like if she told everyone, this dream or illusion will disappear and she'll be back in the hovel she had with Wickham and she didn't want that, she wanted this, even if it was a dream or illusion.

"I will … tell you that is, but … later." Lydia looked away, Kitty felt disappointed but she knew her sister like her sister knew her she needed time and she would be patient, after all Lydia didn't keep things from her long.

"I wish you could tell me now," Kitty told her "but I'll wait until you are ready."

Lydia looked at her in gratitude and nodded.

"I think we should let everyone know that you are awake and that you are better." Kitty told her walking with Lydia out of their bedroom after changing into a morning dress. It took a little while for Lydia to dress, touching the cloth, she couldn't remember the last time she owned something so beautiful, she knew by the Ton's standards her dresses were not much but to her living the past six years the way she did, the clothes she could see she owned were the most beautiful things ever.

Everyone was seated at the table, when Lydia and Kitty walked in, a hush settled over everyone. Not accustomed to silence at their breakfast table, Lydia sat down in a rush.

"Child, are you alright?" her father asked

She looked at him, her father, the one her mother was scared that would die before her leaving them in the hedgerows healthy with the sparkle in his eye that found anything amusing. Last time he saw him at Jane's funeral he was a shadow of himself, there was no amusement there, he was weak, haunted. She definitely liked this version better.

"Yes, papa. I was attacked by nightmares that were too vivid for myself to handle."

He studied her and she felt like shrinking into herself like her father could see all the horrible things she went through, they went through. He nodded picking up his reading material.

"Lydia dear, Hill cooked all your favorites."

"Thank you, mama." she smiled at her mother, hearing her just made her so happy to the point were her eyes were threatening to fill with tears again.

"Would you like to go for a walk to the Merryton, Lydia? That might make you feel better."

She looked at Lizzy, her sister, her strong unbelievable sister who choose love over comfort.

"I would very much appreciate that, Lizzy." They were surprised, this Lydia was subdued, polite, articulate. It was strange but maybe a walk into ton would bring Lydia's lively composition back.

Lydia was just happy to do something so mundane again with all her sisters.

They ate breakfast and even though Lydia was strange in her less lively nature, the table got loud and all the women at the table had something to say and talk about, with Mr. Bennet interjecting here and there seeking amusement.

After breakfast all the girls grabbed their bonnets and petticoats and set out to Meryton, while walking there Lydia thought about what day and year she found herself in. It didn't cross her mind to ask until now, she at least she knew it was before Wickham got into their ton but when exactly she was unsure.

"Kitty did Netherfield have new borders?"

"What are you talking about Lydia, Netherfield hasn't been let for a long time."

We at least it's before the neighbors got to town as well, but how many days, months or years? It couldn't have been too much, she was wearing clothing that she wore back then.

The trip to town was relaxing, she laughed with her sisters, but it seemed she was acting strange as she didn't stray from her older sisters though Kitty was dragging her along a little and she definitely wasn't flirting with any of the boys she passed by which made the sisters look at her very strangely. She tried not to pay attention to the looks. Man scared her, falling in the same trap she did with Wickham was scaring her and she steered away from all of them, even the ones she's known for years, sometimes even hiding behind her older sisters, making Kitty throwing her looks that were asking her what was wrong. She wasn't sure how to explain, maybe on the way back she'll figure out as they will for sure ask of her behavior.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's note: Hi everyone, hope you all are well in this trying time. I know this is a late update. I have never forgotten these stories of mine. I don't have much written but I want to start making time for this, as I love writing. I hope you like this new chapter. It's more of a filler chapter that needs to be here for the development of the sisters. I thank everyone who has reviewed and have looked at this story. **

Chapter 3

The trip to the ton made Lydia realize how much she took for granted as a young woman. She had pocket money and her sisters would give her more if she pestered them enough. On this trip they were surprised she did not buy a thing. It felt strange to have so much money that she could buy the bonnet she saw in town that would marvelous on her head. For years she scrounged up every cent she could to be able to eat or to warm herself during the colder days in London. Now the idea that she would go home and her parents were there and they provided her with so much comfort, with so much love. The more she thought about it the more she wanted to cry. So many things were oblivious to her young mind.

"Lydia?"

"Yes, Jane."

"Are you alright?" Jane looked at her in concern as did the rest of her sisters.

"I am perfectly alright, dear sister. I have enjoyed my time in the ton with all of you."

They all abruptly stopped, even Mary was having a hard time dealing with the new Lydia, she was polite, she asked her questions, she didn't buy anything and whenever she saw something in the shops window it was always to say that the clothes or bonnets would look splendid on one of them, even herself.

Lizzy grabbed her hand and they all stepped away from the road to sit and talk to her away from everyone.

"Lydia, you are very unlike yourself. You are not as … outgoing with the men as you usually are. You look at things and think of us rather than yourself. Lydia, you didn't buy anything."

"Is it that strange?" she asked looking at all her sisters.

"Yes." they shouted

Lydia sighs.

"We do not want to push you in telling us what is wrong, Lydia, but we are worried." Jane said gently, taking her hand.

Lydia looked at her, such a gentle creature, so beautiful yet so much suffering for Jane due to her mistakes. 'Should I tell them?' she thought 'it would help me be understood.' Looking at all her sisters she knew that it is not the right time to tell them.

"I know it is most unlike myself, dear sister. I will tell you as soon as I am able to understand what is happening. At the moment I am not sure what to say to make all of you less worried. I had horrible nightmares that I am not able to talk about as of yet. They scared me."

Lizzie took her hand and patted it. Lydia looked at her, her understanding sister, who she never blamed for what happened.

"We understand Lydia. We will wait for you to tell us. If there is something uncomfortable or something you wish from us ask us and we shall do our best to assist you."

She was about to raise up and walk home. They were ready as well, but she remembered something.

"I do like to ask sisters that we can better prepare ourselves for society. I see the error of my ways in my acting with such wild behavior. I have thought I knew best what to do to have myself a husband but I see my behavior will only attract those who would ruin us."

"Lydia you cannot be so hard on yourself."Jane cried and tried to reassure her, Lizzie nodded, Mary and Kitty were silently listening to their sisters talking. Lydia was acting strange and they still have not been able to understand how to act around the changes.

"Dear Jane, thank you for your sweet nature, but I cannot deny anymore that I have not been acting proper and everyone has let me do as I please. I want to be a better woman and I want all of us to be happy in our lives. You above all deserve that Jane. I do not want to be an obstacle in my sister's happiness."

"Lydia, if that is what you wish for we can start giving all of the lessons that we have learned from our aunt in London."

"That is what I would love. I want to be better. Kitty would you be alright with that? Mary?" Lydia asked earnestly.

Mary and Kitty looked at each other and then nodded.

"Then starting tomorrow we can start our lessons." Jane said getting up as did all the rest and started to walk back home as the evening sun was close to setting. They hurried along.

Back home they ate a little bread and they all turned into bed as soon as it was proper. Mrs. Bennet was glad to see her youngest more spirited and was glad to turn in early. Mr. Bennet was just grateful for the peace and quiet even when all his girls came home, though strange, he did not question it.

Upstairs in their respective bedrooms Lydia got ready for bed and laid down as did Kitty.

"Kitty?"

"Yes, Lydia?"

They looked at each other in the dark.

"I am sorry for my strange behavior. My nightmares have made me afraid of men, I was not aware of it until we went to town how much it has affected my behavior with our neighborhoods and gentlemen we have known for years."

"It is alright Lydia. I want to tell you I have never completely been alright with our behavior but it felt nice to have their attention."

"Thank you Kitty."

"Kitty?"

"Yes, Lydia."

"Do you want to take lessons from Lizzie and Jane? I asked them but I did not ask you if you would like lessons as well."

"I do, Lydia. I believe it will be beneficial for all of us to be able to be more proper as we are approaching the time to be married."

"Yes, I think we will be better looked upon if we are proper gentlewomen."

"Are you scared of being married, Lydia?"

"I am scared of being married to a scoundrel. You cannot ever know how a man acts with his wife before marriage. It is very scary to think that we will be unhappy in marriage."

"I have not thought of that, but that is something that can happen."

"It is alright, Kitty. We will take precautions to ensure that does not happen."

"Alright Lydia. I bid you goodnight."

"Goodnight, Kitty."

The next morning all the Bennet girls after breaking their fast gathered in the garden to make lesson plans.

"There are certain attributes a gentlewoman should have such as an understanding of art, reading, instruments, proper manners and eloquence and current events." Jane recited from memory what her aunt explained.

"Then let us all teach others what we know best. I know Kitty is best at art. Mary is best at piano. Jane is best at proper manners and eloquence. I can teach about current events and books. And Lydia you can help us with our fashion. You are knowledgeable about what should be put together and what suits each of us." Lizzie stated. The girls looked a little embarrassed to be told what they are excelling.

"That is put together well. Is everyone in compliance?" Jane asked

"Yes." the girls answered.

"What should we start with first?" Kitty asked.

"Can I … ?" Mary started then stopped.

"Go on Mary." Jane encouraged.

"I believe that we should do a little bit everyday. Maybe on Monday and Wednesday we focus on music and art. Tuesday and Thursday books and proper manners. Current events and eloquence can be everyday. Fashion we can mend and talk about it after dinner." She finished looking down.

"I think that is a swell idea, Mary." Lydia exclaimed.

Mary looked at her and beamed. She was always the odd one as she was not particularly close to any of her sisters. Being appreciated or taken into consideration made her feel warm all over.

"Mary," Lydia looked at her, "I know you like the Froid sermons and we have not listened to your words, but sister reciting them as you do is not to anyone's fancy. I do believe that Froid can let us better understand some things but they can be counterproductive to a person if not taken into proper consideration which people are in your company."

Mary hung her head low.

"Oh, no, Mary! I didn't mean to upset you. I want to communicate with you and spend time with you. Please understand I did not mean to hurt your feelings." Lydia cried on the verge of tears, she didn't want to push Mary away. She wanted to be her sister and enjoy their time together, especially if Lydia will be a spinster. Having all her sisters her companions was the best for the outcome she saw for herself and Mary was a great person to be around when she didn't judge people because of their need to not read the Froid sermons.

"It's alright, Lydia. I don't particularly like them, it's just the one thing I know most out of all of you and it brings me some comfort."

Lydia hugged her sister as did the others. All five made a group hug with Mary in the middle, nobody completely understood how hard it was for Mary being without a companion of her own.


	4. Chapter 4

Author's note: Thank you all for reviewing and liking/favoriting/following this story. I am getting back into it and I always know where I want it to go, just finding the right way to put it makes it a little difficult.

Some of you have expressed that my grammar might be lacking. I agree, it is somewhat lacking but I hope you can enjoy this story anyway even with my lack of grammar. If you would like to help me with editing I would appreciate it. I can send you an invitation to my google doc. There was something in the last couple of sentences that someone was kind to mention that it is not Froid sermon but Fordyce sermons that Mary reads. I will read that and see what appealed to Mary in them. Also the word petticoats in the earlier chapter was supposed to be pelisse

Thank you again and hope you like the new chapter. I do appreciate your comments and reviews.

Chapter 4

In two weeks the sisters used their times to be productive. Kitty loved teaching everyone the arts and she was an encouraging, patient, shy person.

For Mary it was a little more difficult to teach because she wanted to teach them hard parts to play in their first meeting and she always chose music that was complicated and in Lydia's words a little boring. What the sisters didn't know was that Lydia knew how to play the piano very well. The last two years before coming back she made money playing piano. She loved the little white and black keys that can comfort her. After a little talk with consideration to Mary's feelings her style to teach changed. Once she understood her sisters feelings and her need to slow down, the lessons went better and with more improvement everyday and with more happy tunes played by her which made her ecstatic.

Books and current events were interesting and reading together and talking about the books found all the girls engaged. Lydia read three books over and over again before she came back. She had to keep them hidden from Wickham and they brought her comfort and reminded her of her father and his study. After a while Lizzy, at the urging of her sisters, started teaching them the languages she knew for them to be able to read a bigger selection of books. They were not yet ready to ask their father to help, but it seemed like Lizzy was looking to the day her father can have a discussion with all his daughters.

Fashion was made up of a lot of laughter when trying on clothes and mending things. Lydia was an assistant to a seamstress in London for four years before coming back. She started teaching her sisters the fastest way to mend their clothes and she made their dresses look so different they looked finer and more elegant than before. Her sisters were impressed and she felt a little shy.

The eloquence and manners time was spent in a gentle manner. Jane was easy going and told her sisters the errors in a way that made them comply to her words without feeling like they were inadequate or hurt.

Their mother was a little worried for her children but she admired them because they looked like they were taking her words of finding a husband with a more focused mind. And their father was happy to have a calmer house.

Lydia found herself one morning as the earliest riser, got herself dressed and went outside to take a little walk. She needed to gather her thoughts. It's been four weeks since she came back. Time with her sisters and neighbors was well spent and not being around men improved her spirits. She didn't have to dedicate herself to anyone other than her family. She needed to organize her thoughts. She realized in her second week back that there is only one more month until Netherfield is let at last. Thinking about the neighbors who will be coming soon brought back a flashback of the last time she saw Mr. Bingley

'I must get a little bit of money before the morning to be able to get to Longbourne. Lydia thought while hurrying home from her job as an assistant to a seamstress. Hurrying along in the cold weather trying to pull at her clothes to keep herself warm made her bump into somebody, knocking him on the ground.

"Please forgive me, sir. I was not looking up."

"There is no problem, madam." The gentleman said dusting himself. The stench of alcohol was strong and wafting on the breeze blowing towards her. He looked up and exclaimed:

"Jane?!" He grabbed her hand "I have missed you for so many years. What are you doing here? When did you arrive in London?"

Lydia was shocked, she did not recognize this gentleman and he did not look sane to her.

"Sir, let go. I am not Jane."

He stopped and peered at her through glossy eyes. He shook himself and let go.

"I beg your pardon madam, you look similar to a young woman I once had the pleasure of meeting." He walked past her.

"Sir," he turned around, "are you perhaps referring to Jane Bennet?"

"Do you know her?" He asked joyfully

"She is my sister, sir!" What is your name?" She asked not being able to recognize him, but maybe Jane met him after Lydia married.

"My name is Charles Bingley."

"Mr. Bingley?" Recognition crept on Lydia's face "I do remember you sir, you left our town in such a hurry. We all thought that you would come back and marry Jane, the way you paid her attention."

His head hung low and couldn't meet her eyes.

"I dearly wanted to but she gave me no indication that she feels the same as me."

Lydia was shocked and looked at him like he had three heads.

"I beg your pardon!" she exclaimed loudly. He looked at her startled.

"I know that men can be stupid and idiotic but this, sir, is taking it too much. She didn't feel the same. Were you not with her at every turn? Did she not stay and sought your company? Her smiles at you, were you blind to them?" She shouted ingrain. Lydia might've cared about herself a lot when she was younger but she also knew the feelings Jane held for Mr. Bingley.

"I was told that that is her stance and her behavior with all those around her. I was not special and if another man with the money I held would come around she would show the same treatment."

She slapped him, he looked disorientated at her and shocked.

"My sister gave her affection to the wrong man, it seems, and now she is being buried all because the man she held affection for, trusted those around him and not her." Lydia started crying, turning around and walking away. He caught on to her wrist and turned her around desperately.

"Jane … what happened … to … to Jane? Tell me!" He screamed. Lydia shrunk into herself in fear.

"She died yesterday. I am trying to put money together to go visit them. Our family fell into ruin at my own mistake and she married a vulgar widowed man who can burn in hell." She said gaining strength in her speech the more she talked about the unfairness that befell her angelic older sister.

"She's dead? She married? She … she … is dead?" His knees buckled and fell to the ground.

"No, no, that was not supposed to happen. She was supposed to be happy and she was supposed to love me." Lydia rolled her eyes at the egotistical man "Darcy told me she will be fine. He told me she held no affection for me as I did her. I trusted him. I … Jane … please no … I don't know ... I don't know what to do." He started crying in sorrow, mourning his foolish mistake.

"Mr. Bingley, I have to go. Will you be alright?" Lydia prodded him gently.

"Yes, yes, I will. I just need a few more minutes." Lydia nodded and turned to leave, looking back at this man who even after so many years held her sister in the highest esteems.

"Madam," he called out, standing up on shaking legs. "Please let me offer my assistance by providing you with money for your fare."

Lydia had to battle between pride and seeing her sister and her family one more time.

"I would like to say that I can pay you back, but I do not believe we will meet again, sir. I do thank you and may God bless you." She took the money and walked away, turning around just one more time to see the man who once stood tall in front of them, beaten down by the news of her sister.

They were a month away from invading their lives. Should she help Jane and Bingley or should she stay out of the whole thing and see how it plays out. As she won't be running away with Wickham the prospects of her sisters will not fall like they did before and Jane could possibly find another gentleman who would love and treasure her. She was going to head inside as the sun was climbing higher in the sky when she observed Lizzy stepping outside to go on a morning walk. Lydia remembered she wanted to talk to Lizzy about their father. If they were going to have better prospects for marriage or to be able to live on without their father they needed money and it seemed like her father gave up on taking care of his land and tenants. Lizzy was the best person to talk to about how to make the situation better. She rushed after her older sibling.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's notes: Hello everyone. Thank you so much for liking this story and favoriting it. I enjoy writing it a lot. I think there would be some questions coming from this chapter regarding Wickham and they will be answered all in good time. I hope you enjoy this chapter. "_It felt nice to be home" _Stay safe everyone.

Chapter 5

"Lizzy, Lizzy!" Lydia called out when she got closer. Lizzy's walks were always fast paced when she walked by herself.

Lizzy turned around "Lydia? What are you doing out so early in the morning?"

"Needed to think about some things. Can I walk with you?" Lydia asked apprehensively.

"Of course." Lizzy smiled and hooked her arm through Lydia's.

"What is it you need my help with, Lydia?"

"How did you know?"

"You wouldn't come for a walk otherwise. You, my dear, like your sleep."

It was true, she loved sleeping in, in the days when life was leisurely spent and she was young life was fun, full of possibility and love. Now, she would wake up before anyone else due to nightmares. Everyday was torture, she feared waking up only to find herself back in the hovel in London with Wickam.

"It's alright, Lydia," Lizzy said, placating her sister, seeing her quiet without a quip felt strange.

Lydia looked at Lizzy "it's alright, Lizzy. I do like sleeping in." Lydia smiled, Lizzy felt relieved.

"I needed to speak to you about the situation of our land."

Lizzy looked at Lydia surprised, "what do you mean?"

Lydia stopped walking, looked into Lizzy's eyes and plunge into her speach.

"Lizzy, our situation in life is not very high. Can we alter it? Maybe talk to father and find ways to make more money, have a higher dowry. Maybe our uncle Grandier can help us. I want us to have choices Lizzy. I want Kitty, Jane, Mary, you, mama to be able to live without the fear that we won't be able to support ourselves if papa is not around or that Mr. Collins throwing us into the hedgerow, just like mama fears."

"Lydia, such a heavy conversation to have. Are you alright? Something changed with you. It helps that we are all pursuing to be better but it feels like you are being chased by something."

Lydia sighed, started to walk slowly forwards looking to the ground for the words to explain "I realized recently Lizzy that mama's way of catching a husband can only put us in the path of scoundrels and rakes. It is frightening to be married to a scoundrel of a man. Our station in life does not give us much choices." She shuddered to think that any of them would marry a Wickham. She couldn't help it when her tears ran down her cheeks. There has been a lot happening to her, nightmares keeping her awake, the new neighbors coming, Jane and Bingley and most importantly Wickham being in the same town, meeting him again, seeing him charm women and ruining them without a care in the world.

"Lydia, I am really glad you are making an effort to change yourself and I support all of us going forwards, gaining choices but I am not sure what you would like me to do." Lizzy said looking at Lydia mistified.

"Father loves you above all of us." Lizzy tried to interject "it's alright Lizzy we all know, you are papa's favorite and me, mama's favorite." Lizzy let it go, it was a subject that debating it will bear no fruit. "I want us to help better manage the estate, just like we have improved ourselves, maybe we can improve our station. We can also talk to uncle Grandier in London and see if we can invest. Anything that will help us gain more to be self-sufficient in our lives."

Lizzy became thoughtful, it was true that they worked on themselves and were becoming different women and closer than ever. "Lydia you must understand that if we speak with papa, he might not be receptive, also to rise we might need to have less pin money and sacrifice in ways that might not be in your favor for a while."

Lydia smiled "there is nothing to fear on that account, Lizzy, if less pin money now means that we'll be able to choose from a better pool of men than I do not mind, dear sister."

"Lydia, are you sure?" Lizzy asked stressing the question. Lydia willingingly giving her pin money or receiving less was a wonder that amazed and terrified Lizzy.

"Lizzy, I am serious." Lydia looked Lizzy square in the eyes with a conviction that left Lizzy speechless. "Should we request help from uncle in this regard? Might he persuade papa to work harder or to let us help in managing and doing the books for the estate?"

"We can write to him while informing our sisters of the decision we have reached and ask their opinions on the matter. Tonight we can speak with papa, all of us, persuade him to listen."

"I find that sounds like a wonderful plan. Now, we must hurry home to break our fast and continue lessons."

"It has been wonderful Lydia for all of us to interact, to learn from each other, to help in becoming more successful women."

"It has been, Lizzy. I am truly happy to stay like this for the rest of our lives."

Lizzy laughed "what about a husband.? Not so long ago you were telling us that you will be the first to marry and show off your _dear_ husband."

Lydia smiled bitterly "I suppose I thought so, to the encouragement of mama and society, plus I have always wanted to be the first to have something to lord it over all of you."

"Not anymore?" Lizzy asked jesting, smiling.

"No, not anymore. I want to stay here for as long as papa can keep me. Men are terrible creatures and devious." Lydia shuddered again, Wickham's arrival was closer with each day that passed.

Lizzy held her back and worry etched her face.

"Lydia, what has happened? Has someone done something to you? Have you been … been … _violated_?" Lizzy whispered the last word fearing for her sister.

"Lizzy, no. I had a particular nasty nightmare and realized that my foolishness can bring more destruction to me than I ever thought possible if I do not pay attention to decorum. I wanted to see the world as everyone loving me like you all have. The world is not that good, it could be merciless, harsh and men have authority over us. I have heard stories of what that could possibly mean to a girl who cannot defend herself."

Lizzy breathed in greatly, Lydia's action could mean the worse for a young girl. She was so relieved to hear that nothing happened to her baby sister. Though it still not quite explained her behavior completely, Lizzy was willing to let it go for now.

"I am overjoyed to hear that nothing of the kind happened to you, Lydia." Lizzy hugged her, nobody should ever go through that.

It seemed a little funny to Lydia that even when she ran away, it was her choice and she willingly went to bed with Wickham without any security for the future except for his words. How quickly that changed when he found out that he was not going to inherit Longbourne, that he lost to a cousin nonetheless. In that moment Lydia became an obstacle to his future. Lydia shooked herself to attend to Lizzy's words.

"I will tell you of my nightmare Lizzy. I try not to dwell on it, but I am sure when I come to terms with it I will say everything to you and our sisters." She trusted Lizzy, she was a good woman and a loyal person when she gave her heart to you.

"I will wait for the day, Lydia." Lizzy squeezed her hand in comfort.

They arrived at the breakfast table just as Hill went out of the room.

"Where have you been, child? Gallivanting through the wilderness again?" Their mother addressed Lizzy without glancing in Lydia's direction.

Lizzy smiled and went to sit next to Jane. Lydia lagged behind thinking about her mama's words to Lizzy that she heard growing up. She wished she was more like Lizzy, steadfast in her convictions, speaking with all in such a way that would give all passes and flattering her. She was a quiet beauty that once seen you wanted more and more. Lydia did not understand why her mother was acting in such a way with Lizzy. Dwelling on that though would have to wait as Kitty beckoned her to a seat in between her and Mary. Lydia smiled, for the first time since she came back this scene felt the most familiar and most welcomed. Breakfast with her family, her mother's boisterous voice, her papa quietly looking over everyone, and her sisters with their own world that took shape every day. _It felt nice to be home_.


End file.
